The first thing I ever wanted to be was a chef, and I wanted to be this because I was excited by the feedback I would get when making food for people. I really enjoyed seeing people eat and enjoy what I’d made. There was a great reward in that. I still love making meals and desserts for people, especially when I know it is something that will make them smile and their taste buds moan.
After wanting to be a chef, I turned my focus toward acting. I fell in love with the idea of being an actor in plays and films. I wanted to entertain people. I wanted to bring people on an emotional journey.
During my acting phase, I discovered writing. I started writing short stories and poems with the intent of creating an emotional response in readers. Even from a young age, I just wanted to make people feel something. I wanted to know that I could bring joy and heartache and beauty through a creative lens.
As I grew older, I got a little shier. I realized that my true passion was in writing. I would lock myself away in my room for days and just write, write, write. I was angry when I had to stop. I didn’t want to sleep because it would take away from my writing time. It became less about creating an emotional experience for others and more about an emotional escape for me. I loved it. I craved it.
I think that I want to be a writer now because I have all of these stories, characters and worlds built up in my head that I want to express. I want the daydreams that I have to find life on pages for others to read. I want to lose myself in the process of writing.
Through writing this, I realize that the driving force behind my decision to be a writer is the desire for emotional experiences both for me and for others. I’ve always known that I’m driven by my emotions. Everything I do and have done has always been rooted in emotion.
I’m satisfied with this discovery.